Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts

Sunday, May 08, 2022

Mothers Day Without Mother




This is the first Mothers Day of my seventy-five years when I have no way to visit with or even call my Mother. Just two days before her stroke she posed with the first bloom on these hibiscuses I had planted in her front yard. 

Mother turned 98 in February before her stroke on July 21, 2021 and her death on August 1 last year. I visited with her in person or by phone at least five times a week her last few years. We could all see that she was weaker, She had survived several cancers, tri-geminal neuralgia (a horrible illness, and other health problems. Just a couple of weeks before her stroke I had had to talk with her about the need for her to either move to one of her children's homes or to an assisted living facility or to accept live-in help. She said she would "when it is time to, but not yet". Given all that you'd think that I'd be prepared for her death. And I supposed intellectually I was.

Many of my friends have lost their mothers -- almost all at much younger ages. It seems almost selfish at seventy-five to mourn her so. 

But how I miss my Mother.

She would light up when I walked in. 

My parents were not perfect, of course, but their love for me and my siblings was unconditional and sure and lit their faces. Daddy's been gone for 35 years. I still miss him. And how I miss my mother.


Sunday, July 11, 2010

Sunday Concert: Amazing Grace for Mother

My wonderful mother has been after me to record some of the hymns I often sing (usually at funerals). Actually my vocal coach, Angela Flannigan McRee and I have been busy recording some of those and other songs for quite a while. We have about a dozen finished so the world wide web will have to put up with more Terrell recordings for a while.

I only know how to upload music that is attached to video - hence the somewhat random old family pictures to accompany the song.

This arrangement is one of my favorites. I've been singing it for a couple of decades, thanks to Rachel Jones who introduced me to it. I am glad it includes the fourth verse - often skipped in congregational singing, much to my chagrin.

So here are four verses (plus the final verse added by later generations) of John Newton's hymn to the Amazing Grace that can reverse the course of even a wretched slave trader.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Speeding Tickets

My mother suggested I submit this e-mail as a post on Alone On a Limb. I do what my Mama says -- except in politics.

For many years I was able to brag that I had never gotten a speeding ticket. Alas, I lost my chance to beat (my sister) Joan's record. It was only after I was a daddy that I started getting speeding tickets. I think I have had a total of three at this point.

The first was here in Rome late in 1985. It was certainly deserved. I was hurrying, late to school, and was stopped for going 45 in a 30 MPH zone. The only thing memorable about that is that I goofed up and, in the midst of Christmas and New Year celebrations, let the deadline pass without paying the fine and so had to go to court, even though I was not contesting it. I remember the court date well because it happened to have been the day (my uncle) Jack Shaw died. Sheila was at work. I had to pick up Brannon from Kids' Stop (day care) and then with my young child go sit in the big county courtroom on the second floor of the 1890 Floyd County Courthouse with its scary gargoyles on every corner, and wait my turn to plead guilty while I dealt with the shock of my uncle's sudden and very premature death.

The courtroom was crowded with an assortment of seedy looking folk. Two-year-old Brannon sat in my lap on the second bench from the back as the court officers called one case after another. Public drunkenness. Driving under the influence. Brawling. My mind had wandered far from the courtroom when I was jolted by the calling of my name. "Guilty!" I said, much too loud, and leaving no doubt in the minds of any listener of the sincerity of my plea. The unshaven wizened old coot on the row behind leaned in at that point to ask what it was I was accused of.

I earned my second speeding ticket in North Carolina on an Interstate, on the way home from Sunset Beach or Topsail maybe. I was just going with the flow (75 or 80 probably) when a NC State trooper picked me out of a bevy of candidates. I knew I was speeding - like virtually all the cars ahead and behind me. I was ready to pay my debt to society. I held no ill will toward the officer: but I was curious. So while he was filling out the forms and my wife sat quietly at my side and my two angelic daughters observed the interrogation of their criminal father, I asked the question on my mind. I asked it pleasantly and in a tone of genuine curiosity and motivated solely by a wish to be educated on the topic: "How did you happen to choose to stop my car out of all the speeding cars today?"

My bride gasped in exasperation and uttered my name in a stage whisper. The policeman did not really answer my question, but my question was a topic of discussion in our automobile for a while. My wife should have known by that point that I have conducted more interviews than Larry King - I just don't get paid for them. Anytime I am thrown in with another human being, I ask questions. I have discovered that virtually everyone has an interesting story. I always want to know it. This is a trait that has resulted in unexpected friendships and entertaining information and interesting experiences. Unfortunately, I occasionally run into someone who interprets curiosity and friendliness as impertinence.

I was truly just curious to know how he happened to pick me. Would he stop the very next speeder he would see after ticketing me? Does he stop each tenth speeder? Did my out-of-state tag influence him?

The third time I was ticketed for speeding it was late one evening on Highway 27 somewhere in southwest Georgia. We were on our way home from Tallahassee. Brannon, Lillian, and Sheila were in the car. I was obviously guilty as sin. I asked no questions of the officer. I paid the 85 dollars, if not happily, at least without complaint, on time by mail. Even I am capable of learning from my mistakes.

Though I had not been given a speeding ticket till 1985, I had been stopped and given warnings several times, the most notable being the first time in about 1963.

I was coming home one night, I think alone, from Atlanta to Rome on Georgia 101 between Rockmart and Rome, when I saw the flashing light - I think they were red back then - behind me. The fervent prayer that immediately beamed heavenward from my brain was: "Please Lord, don't let that be Uncle Tom!"

I pulled to the shoulder, put the car in park, retrieved my license, and watched as my worst fears were realized in the rear-view mirror. I stepped from the car to face the music. Uncle Tom, who on my sixteenth birthday in March had presented me my driver's license, was writing a different presentation on a pad as he approached. As he lifted his eyes to the miscreant before him, I saw recognition enlarge those eyes and he exclaimed : "Terry Shaw!"

He let me go with a very effective warning. Any time for the next few years that I was tempted to speed in Northwest Georgia, I was convinced God would put Uncle Tom behind the next underpass.

I have been stopped a number of times, but have usually been sent on with a warning.

[6-21-08 -- The following paragraph has been edited slightly after talking with David Jones about his memories of this event.]

One evening my senior year in high school I turned onto Broad Street in the old Chevy coppertone nine passenger station wagon that we had bought new in 1960. It was five years old, frumpy, and should have been driven by a suburban Mama, not a cool high school senior. My friend, David Jones, was in the passenger seat. We had just been to an MYF event. David is a great guy who could do amazing things despite a significant handicap. He had been left dependent on heavy leg braces and crutches by a childhood attack of polio.

As we pulled up to the red light at Fourth Avenue another teen driven vehicle, a much sportier one ['56 Ford], pulled up beside us on the inside lane. The driver revved his engine in an obvious challenge to the yokel driving his Mama's station wagon. I grinned at David and said something to the effect that that jerk didn't know the old wagon had a mean V-8 under the hood. It was Sunday night. There were no other vehicles on Broad that I could see. Why not show this jerk a little something.

I revved the V-8. The light changed. Two accelerator petals were floored. I pulled past him, then slowed for the red light at Second Avenue. The 56 Ford turned left and I followed. And just behind us were flashing lights on the only other vehicle on Broad - one that I had somehow overlooked -- a motorcycle cop.

I richly deserved a ticket for my irresponsible behavior. The officer signaled us to stay put as he walked past to handle the other guy. David says he remembers the officer saying something like: "So it's you again, Wes." When he walked back to our car the officer informed me that he was going to take my license and the young man seated next to me would have to drive me home. David, bless his heart, showed off his leg braces and informed the officer that, though he could drive, the stodgy old station wagon was not suitably equipped.

At some point the officer, from embarrassment or mercy or divine intervention, decided I looked like maybe I'd learned my lesson, and if I'd promise to behave he'd let me off with a warning and not tell Charles Shaw or Raymond Jones -- both of whom he knew!

And there's more than you likely want to know about Terrell's criminal career.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Jonquils from our yard and bugs on Mama's house

As I gave the yard its first trim of the year in the late afternoon sun today I glanced to the west. The lovely backlit jonquils prompted me to cut the power and go for the camera:



While I was at it I took a few other pics of our assorted jonquils:









Earlier in the day I had given Mother's yard the once over. As we were talking in the yard Mother asked if knew what all those bugs were.



Sure enough, closer inspection of black clumps on the side of her house revealed big clusters of insects with the telltale x on their backs: true bugs, order Hemiptera.


I guessed milkweed bug.



I took lots of shots. Home again I checked Bug Guide. It looks like Eastern Boxelder Bug (Leptocoris trivittatus).




Sunday, October 21, 2007

Sunday Seven: I promise you - A Small Kidney Stone is Someone Else's Kidney Stone.


I have been experiencing the joys of hosting a Kidney Stone for the last several weeks. I didn't know the name of my guest till he kidney-punched me a week ago Saturday. He got in another hard punch last Sunday then just peppered me with light stuff for a few days. Thursday he hid out and until about four yesterday I decided he had left the house. But up he popped and gave me the hardest jolt yet. I walked bent for several hours, popping pain pills. I'd write a line or two of my post about Gary (below) then walk from one end of the house to another bent at the waist and listing several degrees to port (to continue my love of scrambled metaphor). Finally we jumped in the car and visited Immediate Care where a sweet little nurse stung my rear with a hefty dose of some modern magic. Twenty minutes later the pain was gone. It is still gone, but the stone remains and makes himself known in less dramatic ways.

Maybe you are wondering how I'm gonna get a Sunday Seven out of this. Well, folks, I am one thankful guy and at least seven times blessed this cool October morning!

1. I am thankful for Sheila. I can't imagine how lonesome it would be and what additional pain it would make to undergo debilitating pain without a life partner standing by. Sheila took time she couldn't really afford to represent both of us at Gary's funeral on Thursday. She has kept me supplied with delicious chicken/potato soup and corn muffins. She drives her moaning husband back and forth to hospital/doctor/immediate care. She walks the floors with me. She strokes my brow and seems to genuinely love someone who cannot possibly be very attractive right now.

2. I am thankful that I live in 2007. Can you imagine enduring kidney stone pain with no access to medical care. No pain reliever. No idea of an ending other than death. I can imagine a primitive person begging for death after a few hours!

3. I am thankful for the internet. Despite all the junk out there, a person can pretty quickly get a basic education on most any topic, including kidney stones.

4. I am thankful for the love and concern of my two daughters, my mother, and other family members who have called to check on me and cheer me from afar.

5. I am thankful for that magic shot in the tush. I forgot to ask the magician which spell he used with that slender wand.

6. I am thankful for the prayers, calls, and well wishes from so many church, school, family, and internet friends. I'll note one special friend, Mr. Wint Barton, who took the time for an encouraging call.

7. I suspect you all, wherever you are, will hear my deafening thank yous and hallelujahs when I finally get to see my unwelcome 4mm guest!


These are real pictures of relatives of my guest. They are not always so spiky, but ouch! No wonder that thing is hard to get outta there. It may be dug in.
(from another blog.)

Sunday, April 15, 2007

PTSW: Jenny Kissed Me / The Lamp

A Poem to Start the Week

My mother recited this poem the other day as she, a couple of my siblings, and I sat around the table. I hadn't thought of it in years. One of my blogging sisters has beaten me to the punch by posting this at her blog. But, what the heck, I'll post it too. I've had some Jenny-kisses, literal and figural, in my life, haven't you?

Jenny Kissed Me

Jenny kiss'd me when we met,
Jumping from the chair she sat in;
Time, you thief, who love to get
Sweets into your list, put that in!
Say I'm weary, say I'm sad,
Say that health and wealth have miss'd me,
Say I'm growing old, but add,
Jenny kiss'd me.
-- by Leigh Hunt

That poem reminds me a little of the more serious poem Sheila recited to me during our wedding ceremony, 36 years ago. Since I got busy and skipped a PTSW last Monday, I'll give a twofer today:

The Lamp

If I can bear your love like a lamp before me,
When I go down the long steep Road of Darkness,
I shall not fear the everlasting shadows,
Nor cry in terror.

If I can find out God, then I shall find Him,
If none can find Him, then I shall sleep soundly,
Knowing how well on earth your love sufficed me,
A lamp in darkness.

~Sara Teasdale

Yes, I recited one of my own poems to her that day: Wedding Song
Another of my sister's has posted poetry this week. Check out Daddy's Roses.

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The series of posts, A Poem to Start the Week, is my little anthology of poetry, many of which I have used with my students in elementary schools during 27 years of teaching.


Thursday, February 23, 2006

TT: 13 Great Posts


Thirteen Great Posts

A hodgepodge of blogs and other web posts that I have found interesting, inspiring, enlightening, or otherwise extraordinary. Check 'em out.
  1. The Questing Parson Visits A Pianist.
  2. Leonard Pitts On The Frightened Right
  3. Ben Witherington On Trading Rights For Security
  4. A Tribute To A Very Special Mother - Mine
  5. 83 Tributes to My Mother
  6. Freedom Of Speech/Respect For Religion
  7. Imagine!
  8. Mike's Memories
  9. Test Your LQ Here (BTW I Flunked)
  10. A Favorite 13 for Thursday
  11. Washington's Pants (Scroll Down)
  12. And Why In the World Do Men's Pants Have Flies? (Scroll Down)
  13. Once people make your story, their story,
    you have tapped into the powerful force of faith.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!