A Whole Year of Ruthie Joy!

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.” ― Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities

It has been a horrible year. It has been a year of financial crisis, rampant disease, bald racism and hatred, and terrible death. It has been a year of stark division and anger in the nation at large, even in our church, and, yes, even in our wider family. 

But it has also, thank God, been a year of you, dear Ruth.

Your newborn picture!

You, our little Ruthie, were born on this date, November 15, one year ago. 

Then...

Two days later, according to a report from the Chinese government, a 55-year-old person in the Hubei province became the first known human case of Covid-19. 

It will be a while before you can appreciate these facts that were on grown up minds during the day of your birth. Your first day with us was the very day Roger Stone was convicted on all seven counts against him. It was the day his friend in our White House lashed out at Ambassador Marie Yovanovitch for testifying truthfully at the impeachment inquiry. The news was full of reports of Lev Parnas's secret mission to discredit Joe Biden. Our American president granted clemency that day to Army officers credibly accused of war crimes. And he argued to keep his tax returns secret before the Supreme Court. It was also the day the Italian council was flooded right after they had rejected taking measures to slow climate change. And the morning newspaper reported another deadly school shooting in Santa Clarita, California, just two hours up the Five from where your mom and dad were cradling you for the first time in their arms.

You entered this world at a fraught moment, for sure.

But you don't know that yet.

You are too busy bringing joy and delight into the fallen world. 

You know how to have fun.

You are the quintessential bundle of joy. Ruth Irmgard Carlin, our little Ruthie, you have such a ready smile. What great love, joy, and comfort you have brought to our lives in the midst of a year of financial crisis, rampant disease, bald racism and hatred, and terrible death. 

Sheila and I were thrilled to get our hands on you just a couple of days later and we got to stay in California with you and Clemmie and your parents and Carlin relatives a couple of weeks. It was so hard to leave you in early December. 

We said goodbye with a stop at an In & Out near the airport before we
headed back to Georgia last December.

Back in Georgia we were proud to show off your picture in January before our church family, where your Mom is so loved, at the Louise Langham Baby Recognition service. Your second cousin Charles was also celebrated, as a gift was given to missions in honor of each baby born to the Trinity United Methodist Church family during 2019. Your namesake and great-grandmother Ruth Baird Shaw, my Mama, was there for that service.

At Trinity United Methodist Church in Rome, GA.
L-R: Your Uncle Gregg Lewis, Aunt Debi Shaw Lewis,
Grandma Ruth, Granny, Grandshaw, Julie Langham Humphries,
Anita "Bo" Stewart, Nancy Elder.

The picture we displayed at the Baby Recognition Sunday, your cross, and the list of babies.

Granshaw, Grandma Ruth, & Granny with your picture.

Your cross and Clementine's on our Christmas tree.

We planned to return for Clementine's second birthday in April. I am not sure when the term Covid-19 first entered our consciousness but even when it did we did not appreciate the ways it would change our lives and end the lives of so many Americans including some beloved by me and/or my friends and relatives. 

We made our plane reservations for April.

Alas, those reservations had to be cancelled and you and Clementine celebrated her second birthday socially distanced from the Shaw side of your family by a couple of thousand miles. 

Still we rejoiced with every shared photo or video of your beaming face. You just relished your first year in the almost constant company of your mom and sister and dad. Your Gamma and Papa used their lush and fruitful backyard as a place for the greater Carlin clan to visit socially distanced. Gamma would visit you and Clem from outside the front gate at your house. 

And Granny and I had to depend on Facetime to get live glimpses of you and Clem.

Daddy loves to play with his girls.

And Sheila and I continued to visit you only by way of Facetime. 

In the midst of --

• disappointment at cancelled storytelling gigs, 
• separation from our church and choir communities, 
• virtual, telephone, and postcard campaigning for the very existence of our republic, 
• mourning lost relationships caused by that existential dispute over basic republican values,
• worry for the health of our vulnerable mother, siblings, and other friends and relatives, 
• fighting and marching against the racism exacerbated by our president, 
• agonizing over the Covid-related death of a beloved former student,

--- there you were. Smiling. Learning. Loving life. Leaving the rest of it to us.

Finally we could stand it no longer. The second wave of Covid seemed to be subsiding. Delta was keeping middle seats empty and using careful decontamination procedures and masking. We got tested, quarantined ourselves as much as possible, and flew west. Liliian joined us and creating a "bubble" with Brannon, John, Clem, and Ruth we spent the first week on Mount Palomar in an Air BNB then another week in that "bubble" at Brannon's house. Seeing no illness we enlarged our "bubble" to include John's parents and siblings. 

And so for FIVE glorious weeks we were with our "bundle of joy" and your sister and parents day in and day out. Each day we found another park to visit -- staying masked and distanced and usually WELL distanced on trails and play areas and beaches. If anything the cursed virus kept us closer. For FIVE weeks!

Ruthie with Aunt Lil.

Ruthie with Grandshaw

Ruthie with Granny.

Ruthie with Aunt Lil again

Ruthie with lots of folks who love her at Bobby and Sue's house. 

Many times you slept on my shoulder. Sometimes we both slept. I pushed you in the swing. We examined your daddy's flowers and vegetables growing in the yard. We splashed in the Pacific and built castles on the beach. I am so sorry I did not see you crawling up behind me and allowed you to faceplant into that foot-deep hole in the sand! You were NOT happy about that!  You helped you sister cook me many imaginary meals in your play house and on the back porch. We watched Winnie the Pooh together over and over and over. And Mickey Mouse. You walked miles in the house and yard and on the beach clenching my fingers --- is there a dearer feeling than that? 

And as our day of departure neared you let go of the grown-ups' fingers and tried this bipedal ambulation on your own. Wow. Your mastery of this new locomotion grew every day! What fun for Granny and me to watch you gleefully toddle from your mom to your dad across the grass at the park. Your mischievous father scooted backwards as you came challenging you to maintain your balance a little farther each time.

You are perfectly capable of your moments of rage like any child when you are fed-up with the carseat, or a wet diaper, or uncomprehending adults, but that smile of yours is never far out of your reach.

Ruth, your 73-year-old Grandshaw is so happy and thankful that I reached this ripe old age so that I could know you. I hope to know you for many more birthdays. But I want you to know that even in your very first year, a year of so much stress and pain for the grown-ups, you brought almost incredible happiness to me and your Granny. We both love you to the moon and back!